I bet I'll surprise you with this one! And if I don't, then it will just be a refresher.
But seriously, I just don't see this information going around...
What is it ?
Order at home.
Yes, I said that.
Order.
I'll explain why and how but here is a little background story.
I trained as a Montessori assistant back in 2018. For those who don't know what Montessori is, I'll just say this : it's a pedagogy that supports the child's autonomy and development early on in life (like from birth!). We learned back then that the environment at home was extremely important for the child's development and that there was a way to adapt it.
So, after the training, I go on with my mom life, all excited about it and applying it hardcore.
Until I forget about it.
My son, who's 2 at the time, starts getting super agitated, nervous, has more meltdowns, and just chaos in general.
Not his usual behaviour.
I start wondering why until it hits me : I haven't adapted the environment at home for a month !
So I check the toys, the books, the activities on the shelf and replace several of them. I check that they’re all interesting for him - not too easy and not too hard - and that his little kid’s corner is neat and tidy.
And you know what happens ?
My son's behaviour literally changes within that day.
He is calmer, less overwhelmed and has no more crazy meltdowns (until of course something REALLY bad happens like finishing all the homemade cookies and having not even ONE left...)
I am not kidding that his behaviour changed this fast! I was mind blown. It definitely inspired me even more to apply Montessori at home.
Here is why.
Young children can easily be over stimulated or under stimulated and because they don't know how to express their needs they will show it in a way that will bring attention to that : meltdowns or BIG emotions. Their brain is just not ready to regulate that kind of information.
Order at home is a way to soothe and calm them.
They feel safer.
It's predictive.
Not having too much stuff will teach them to concentrate better too. So decluttering is great !
However, if the stuff that surrounds your children isn't appropriate to their developmental stage, there won't be enough stimulation either, which might lead to more meltdowns. Which you don’t want! So it's like a fine line between knowing what’s too much stuff, not good enough stuff and just the right amount of stuff.
Here are some tips.
Keep an eye on your children's interests and offer age appropriate toys and activities that aren't too overwhelming. Like toys with 5 colours, sounds and different textures are to be avoided because they include too many senses at once and will trigger their little brains.
Keep it simple.
Then when you see that something is too easy or difficult, change it with another toy. Store for later or just get rid of it.
Rotation is great to keep your children interested in toys and activities longer. Keep them for a week or two and then just swap them with other ones until later. This works great for small spaces as well! So you don’t have a ton of toys out at once. Which means less overwhelm for you and the kiddos! Win-win!
Try to have toys and activities placed in the same spot every time. This will give a sens of order to your toddler and bring that predictability that younger kiddos love!
Last but not least, guide your child from an early age to put things back! This has been a life saviour for me! You will see that they go through a phase where order is so important that they start lining things up in a specific order. It’s so fun to watch them!
You will see how keeping in mind order and decluttering can have a huge impact on reducing meltdowns !
Start it slow, don't change everything at once.
Then the more you follow this structure, the more you'll see certain behaviours calming down. Because it's literally a need that they will have fulfilled which is so easy to miss!
When you apply this at home, let me know how it goes!
