Personally, experiencing abuse and toxic relationships was accompanied by being silenced. Finding a voice and a safe space to express myself was a crucial step towards healing. And for a time journalling gave me the freedom to express without repercussions. I didn’t have to worry about having someone deny my experiences or criticise me for feeling a particular way.
My journey of self-discovery and recovery helped me find solace in the practice of journaling, giving me the freedom to own my own narrative and change my thought patterns.
Unlocking Repressed Emotions:
Journaling provides a space where survivors can unlock and untangle the web of emotions that linger after abuse. Writing allows for an unfiltered exploration of feelings, without justification or explanation, but with curiosity. This creates an avenue for self-reflection and a kind of permission slip to feel. Whether it's anger, sadness, confusion, or even moments of joy, the journal becomes a safe place for all emotions.
A Judgment-Free Zone:
Emotions are justified because they are, and are completely valid to the one experiencing them. Personal journaling has a non-judgmental nature. As survivors we often face societal stigmas, or have self-imposed guilt and shame. Journaling offers a sanctuary where every emotion is valid and every thought is acknowledged without condemnation. This lack of judgement creates an environment where survivors can be truly authentic and honest with themselves.
Reclaiming Narrative Control:
Abuse strips individuals of their freedom and power, leaving them feeling voiceless. There are often consequences for opinions that are different to the one your abuser has. Journaling becomes a tool for reclaiming control over one's narrative. It gives survivors the chance to see their inner dialogue and analyse where it originated. Through the written word, survivors articulate their experiences, rewriting their stories with their own truth. This process allows for a shift from victimhood to empowerment. Survivors shape their own narratives and get to define their identities beyond the abusers constraints.
Catharsis through Expression:
The act of putting emotions into words can be cathartic. Emotional abuse and manipulation can create multiple layers of emotions to be experienced within a very short timeframe. The emotions are not fully experienced and the body isn’t able to process them to completion. The conflicting hormones can create brain-fog and confusion. Journaling offers a release valve for pent-up emotions. It can create closure, of sorts, as the emotion is experienced fully and can be released. It's a process of externalising the trauma within, allowing survivors to witness their emotions from a different perspective and, in turn, alleviate some of the emotional burden.
Creating a Dialogue with the Self:
Abuse can limit your internal dialogue as the inner voice becomes the inner critic. The ideas the abuser puts forward when at a heightened state of vulnerability impress on the subconscious mind. After the abuse ends the narrative they have created often continues to live with the survivor. Journaling establishes a powerful dialogue with oneself. It encourages survivors to ask and answer difficult questions, fostering a deeper understanding of their own thoughts and feelings. This helps them clear the limitations their abuser set and nurture a healthier dialogue. This internal conversation becomes a compass guiding them through the difficulties of healing, self-discovery, and growth.
Tracking Progress:
As survivors navigate their healing journey, journaling serves as a compass, helping them track their progress over time. It can often feel like no progress has been made or that things are getting worse. The mental strain can often leave survivors vulnerable to other toxic relationships. The written record becomes a testament to resilience, showcasing not only the challenges but also the triumphs. Looking back can be a source of motivation, reminding survivors of their strength and resilience in getting so far.
Setting Intentions for Healing:
Journaling is not just about documenting the past; it's a tool for setting intentions for the future. Creating and envisioning a future they were once told was impossible for them. Dreaming and hoping. Survivors can articulate their goals for healing, self-love, and personal growth, and they can do it based on what they desire and not by what others dictate they should want. By outlining these intentions, they create a roadmap towards a healthier, more empowered version of themselves.
The transformative power of journaling for self-connection after abuse and toxic relationships cannot be overstated. It's a journey inward, a sacred space for survivors to articulate their emotions, reclaim their narratives, and chart a course towards healing.
For me, starting to communicate with who I really was, I embarked on a profound exploration of self. One that ultimately lead to empowerment, resilience, and the restoration of a sense of self-worth.
Journaling gave me a voice, while to the world I remained silent. And that was exactly what I needed at the time.
If you want to learn more about journaling I have free trainings in my facebook group:
www.facebook.com/groups/theempoweredlegacy
