Thriving after breast cancer calls..
This weeks topic- and about time too!
This is for you if your life has been affected by breast cancer, its also an insight for you if you haven't but your clients or employees have.
Trigger warning: Swearing from the outset, not that sorry.
However- If you want to book me for a talk for your wellbeing event or group- I'll try to omit, pinky promise.
Why do I talk and share about the struggles so often?
Because when you are thriving,whatever that means or feels like to you, in that moment , you don’t need me, or anyone.. your heart is full of joy, your are fearless and you can see ahead, plan ahead, book a holiday even, and nothing can bring you down.
Until it does.
I also know that can be the littlest thing, and it makes you mad, anxious, fearful, tearful and most of the time so fuckity fucking frustrated at yourself because “that” never used to bother you before, or you know it’s just a headache- but in your mind it’s already a brain tumour and now you are having a hot flush, feel depressed, and want to crawl under a rock -again.
That’s where the support can start again if you let it.
The thing is by that point nobody can reach you, not fully. Not when your heart is racing and you have lost the ability to plan anything, it's all overwhelming too much and you will literally live day by day hour by hour in survival mode again. Anxirty affect cognitive function, your immune system, your sleep, your capacity to make deciosions or even be present with your family, I won't go on- and deep breaths won't cut it, not in this place.
It takes more. More time, more "work" , it takes more support that you are getting and from this place of panic, because let's call it what it is.. you aren't in a place to reach for decent nutrition or enough water at times, never mind find support, see if it's right for you, see if the person is right for you, make a decision that feels empowered or even see beyond the end of your own nose.
Guess what- That gets to be different!!!!!!!!
This gets to change! you do get to go to the ball AND you do get to say "fuck this shit" and get off the rollercoaster, and any future visits are a short ride on the toddlers colin the caterpillar ride not the scariest ride in the park- K?
So welcome to the shizzle show that can be Phase 2 - The WTF Phaase- the phase after treatment ends is a rollercoaster for sure.
Nobody told you that bit though hey?
Me either.
BUT you can get off when you are supported in understanding your diagnosis.
The curiosity around the why, that so many run from- please don't.
It wasn't just unlucky and that is the single most powerful thing I can share- if it wasn't just bad luck, it means you can do something about feeling more confident and leaning into the thrive zone a little more.
When you are held in all this conversation brings up for you... which can be a little or alot depending on your stance about where cancer comes from and why you hold the key to diffusing fear around what you have just been through.
When you appreciate that you can do so much to support yourself- so much, that can be learned and added into a daily routine that supports you physically, emotionally and energetically.
The end of treatment is heralded as the "be all"
And it had to be to get you through it, but now you are probably coming to appreicate there’s a huge gap to leap over once it ends, and the safety net of active treatment ends too- and some of us fall into an abyss of adjusting to life altering, body altering, mind altering change - all while the world are so glad “it’s all over” and everything can get back to normal- more on this in coming days.
Hmmm hows "normal" feeling for you?
I found phase 2 a dizzying series of incredible events, old and new friends, joys and new found freedom. It also unlocked new levels of anxiety. It brought new hobbies, like paddle boarding that replaced the ones I could no longer do (ex surfer girl here) That had been a huge part of my life. I navigated parenting among medical meno-effing- pause, and running a buisiness or two too. I had a wealth of knowledge, years of research and a host of incredible women holding me up, while investing in myself on every level just to keep my head above water emotionally- but also so that I could stay, right here, in cancerland- because I wasn't going to leave knowing other women like you or your cleint or your employee needed to know all of this too.
Yet what is widely available as help and support for you to get a grasp on your diagnosis, the impact on your emotional and physical wellbeing, and your future as an individual, as a mum, as a daughter or wife? to get you to higher ground- Nada.
I reached every day for the practices and tools that got me through phase one, never having appreciated that they would be here to stay to actually keep me together way beyond treatment ended.
I found a new found confidence eventually while navigating crazy hair regrowth and new ways to dress to accomodate having one or no boobs with foobs and bras and tears too. Along side all of this heart wrenching grief surfacing from my boots and navigating life having moved on and left with a complete loss of my identity.
Nothing was remotely normal, and too much was "new"
I also had an immense sense of not wanting to go back there either- my normal was what got me here in the first place.
I have thrived, (and my cleints thrive too)- more as time passes purely because I wasn’t prepared to sink, the only option, one day at a time was to find the calm in the storm and swim.
The tools I used to survive and thrive are ones I teach now … are ones that ensured I and all the women I’ve shared these with- thrive not just survive.
Survivors guilt weighs heavy , as does the sense of loss of life we once knew-BUT thriving is a whole other ball game with game changing support to keep you afloat and winning…
You can thrive through breast cancer recovery - and if you choose to dive in- show you how..
Love Rachel xx
The Breast Cancer Conversations at Rachelck.com
Empowered Choices = Empowered Living
Accredited Integrative Cancer Care Womens Empowerment and Transformation mentor.
