Why is my child so difficult?
I grew up thinking there was something wrong with me. I was so easily overwhelmed I just wanted to hideaway from the world. In my teens, I discovered I was a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) (you can take an online test, Google it!). Learning this was a revelation, I wasn't broken, there were others like me. Yet never did I consider I would pass it onto my first born child. Toddlers are a challenge anyway, we had the meltdowns and the fussy eating, but he would also become very easily overstimulated. We soon realised we may as well decline party invitations as they were too much for him, they always ended in tears (including me!) and left them early. Then it struck me, he was like me! Turns out, a HSP parent often has a HSP child, he ticked all the boxes. I can remember being in a loud and crowded IKEA cafe once and my son was hiding under the table. Instead of forcing him to sit on his chair, I could relate! I thought, 'I want to be under there with you!'. Now I understood him, it made parenting a whole lot easier.
Now I know what I'm doing, having a second child will be easy right?
Wrong! Along came my daughter and I expected I would be able to parent her in the same way I did my son. Wrong! She was a wild child, fiercely stubborn and wouldn't go to sleep at night. She wouldn't do a thing I said. I found myself shouting when I had never needed to with my son. Still, she would just laugh at me and do her own thing. Her meltdowns were lengthy, and no one could snap her out of them, she stubbornly held onto her frustrations, so we just had to wait until she had got it out of her system. We later realised she had ADHD, like her Dad, so again we adapted our parenting accordingly.
Understanding Mental Health
My children taught me so much, I wanted to volunteer to help children in schools. I undertook a qualification in Understanding Children Young Peoples Mental Health. Through my research for the course, looking at ways to overcome mental health issues, I kept seeing EFT Tapping come up and the extensive studies on its effectiveness. I decided that is what I needed to train in. The techniques I learned have transformed mine, my children and many other people's lives.
Fears Anxiety
First, I worked on my sons fear of the dark. It had become so extreme, he couldn't bear to be in his room alone, hiding under the quilt, only daring face one direction. He would bolt out of his room like there was a fire, his heart pounding. One tapping session removed 80% of this fear.
Then was his fear of the stairs. He couldn't walk across the landing as he feared he would fall, so again, he would bolt across the landing in fear every single time. 5 mins of tapping on this fear and it was gone forever.
We then addressed his fear of being in the car without me, which meant he couldn't even sit in the car for a moment to wait for me as I locked up. 7 minutes of tapping and this was again cleared for good.
My son had excruciating tummy pains before leaving the house, every single time. We even had to abort Breakfast with Santa, which he had been so looking forward to! One morning when it was really bad, he finally let me tap with him. 5 minutes of tapping and it has never returned.
I could write a book on how tapping has helped my son alone, without even talking about how it has helped my daughter and many other children in schools.
Time to Empower Parents
I don't know what I would do if I couldn't help my children through their issues. EFT tapping is so easy, they can use it for themselves too. Therefore, I decided it was time to share this technique and the tips and tricks I have learned with other parents, caregivers and anyone who is passionate about supporting young people. I have used these tools with 4 year olds to 87 year olds, and use it daily in my own life too.
Emotional Regulation
The tools I share will help with your own mental and emotional health too. We can't help emotionally regulate others when we aren't emotionally regulated ourselves!
So I recorded the free Supporting Young Minds Masterclass
Together, let’s empower the next generation with a wellbeing tool we all would have benefited from learning about sooner!
