So until a few months ago I was a serial ‘lurker’ when it came to networking. Yes, I was a member of the MIB group, and if you’d asked me if I was networking I might have even said ‘yes’. But the truth was I was lurking on the outskirts of the group, watching others achieve success in their businesses, wondering why I wasn’t experiencing the same success in mine. I occasionally replied to someone’s post, sometimes posted myself, and even less often I joined an online networking session, but I didn’t do any of these things consistently, and worse than that, I didn’t know why I needed to.

Networking isn’t passive.

Since becoming a MIB leader for Gran Canaria I have discovered some important truths about networking, and I want to share them with you. Firstly, and most importantly, I have learnt that networking is not passive. You can’t ’half network’ you have to be all in, and it’s intentional, it doesn’t happen by accident.

I used to be a lurker, but as a leader of my own MIB group I can’t be lurking on the outskirts, I need to lead by example. I’ve started attending regular online networking events, Monday night Coffee and Chat is a great one to connect with other women in business, share your ideas or challenges that might be affecting your business, or getting started in one. I’ve discovered that if you attend often enough you start to build genuine connections with the other women who attend each week and it’s like meeting with friends for a cuppa when you get put in a breakout room with other women that you’ve met in there before.

Lurking is ok if you’re just starting out, but eventually you need to jump in with both feet and start to network properly. Maybe attending an in-person event seems a bit scary at first. So build up to it slowly, lurk in the group for a bit, reply to a few posts, and then get stuck in with an online event. This is going to help build your confidence for an in-person event and when you finally make the leap from lurker to attending your first event, you’ll be ready.

Networking doesn’t stop at the end of an event, online or in-person - this is just the beginning

Ok, so you might be giving yourself that pat on the back for finally attending your first event, be it online or a real life meet-up in your local area. You might even be congratulating yourself for doing your networking for the month, that’s it, you went to an event, you’ve ‘networked’. But this is just where it starts! It takes time to cultivate those relationships, build on the connections that you made at the event and really get to know someone. Collaborations take time and you’re going to need to put in the work if you want networking to work for you. 

It’s not as difficult as it sounds. Asking someone for their email, phone number or simply requesting them as a Facebook friend can be the start of a great relationship. But don’t forget to follow up after the event. Check-in with your new contact, become accountability buddies, meet for a cuppa or send a voice note. There’s more than one way to keep the connections going and grow that relationship, and this is when genuine friendships can form, and business collaborations can happen.

Networking works best with an open mind, not a closed agenda.

Attending a networking event might not work quite as you imagined, or it might work exactly as you imagined if you have a closed mind and a specific agenda. Let’s say for example you’re a hairdresser and you’ve just opened a new salon. You might book your ticket for an in-person event with the intention of spreading the word about your new business and gaining a few new clients and this could easily work for you.

However, it’s unlikely that you’ll achieve much more than this, if you enter with such a rigid agenda. So let’s think about an alternative example. The hairdresser attends the event with an open mind. She’s there to share, but also to listen, to ask questions and see what happens. She connects with other local businesses who have products which align with her salon, she receives ideas and feedback from women like her ideal client that will help her to provide an even better service than she is currently offering, and she books a handful of new clients too! So many doors have opened that she wasn’t even expecting; in the future she may run an event with some of the other local businesses who offer products that align with hers; natural skin care products, massage services… the possibilities are endless if you have an open mind.

Your lurking days are over, go out and make those connections!

I know what it’s like to feel nervous about networking, like it’s a space outside of your comfort zone or you’re not really sure how it can benefit your business. But I also know what happens when you decide to network intentionally, jumping in with both feet and an open mind. There is something magical about a group of women meeting up with the sole intention of connection. It’s powerful, empowering and it can truly bring out the best in all of us. It goes beyond just growing your own business, it’s about supporting others to do the same and then watching all of us grow and succeed! So let’s stop lurking and take the leap…

I’d love to hear how you network? Are you still a lurker and if so, what do you need to make the leap into networking for real? If you’re based in Gran Canaria, or even if you’re one of the many tourists who visit our beautiful island each year, I’d love to meet you at one of our future events. You can book a place at our April event here:  https://mibint.co/ask/e2gdtm